Tuesday, October 11, 2011

journal #5

Blazing hot sand was parked the blue Ford skinny car that Johnny owned. Johnny owned this car since he was 13 years old. The village people envied Johnny and his car. Best friend Zachary, one day had the courage to destroy this car. On a rainy Saharan day, Zach was playing with his friends. “Hey Zach, look at Johnny’s car, isn’t hot?” “You know it, I wish I had it.” One of Zach’s friends gave him a 50lbs hamper. “What I am going to do with this?” “Destroy the car obviously, you know Zach that’s what you want.” Zach always had his eye on that car but he knew that didn’t belong to him. His gut told him “ have the courage and strength to do it and not care about what Johnny thinks” but another voice was telling him “ No, don’t do it.” Zach had ended up listening to his other voice and destroyed the car, without thinking how Johnny would react to this action.

1 comment:

  1. Delmy, your grammatical errors definitely distracted me in this paragraph! Read this out loud and catch your errors. I know that you can write a more focused paragraph than this.
    There are good details in here....
    7.5

    ReplyDelete